Gaylords, Cougars, FatOnes Gone Wild

I'd be body remiss if I didn't, before getting into the earth-shifting tidings of last night, touch on a fine piece of Letourneau-esque theatre arts straight from the Philly burbs.
On April 11, [45-year-old Lynne] Extended-Higham [on right in photo] hosted a coed teen party at her home on South Dove Avenue, according to the complaint filed against her. About 20 teens attended the function. Six boys - five of them at the time were 15 and one was 14 - stayed the tenebrosity.
[38-year-old Angela] Honeycutt began a sexually explicit conversation with the boys and "stated something to the for all practical purposes that 'men have to take control to get something they want,' " court papers said. She then allegedly began kissing one of the boys.
Three of the teens later accompanied her to a bedroom, where she asked, "Who wants to knock off a shower?" authorities said.
One of the boys got in the shower with her and engaged in sexual sexual intercourse, the court papers said. Long-Higham and two boys listened at the bathroom door, the documents said. One of the teens popular that Honeycutt "could get into trouble for this," and Long-Higham told him "that's why you can't spill one's guts anyone," the court documents said.
Later, Honeycutt allegedly wrapped up in sex acts with a second teen in the bathroom, and she also was accused of exposing herself and doing a caper during the course of the evening that was "sexual in nature."
That's straighten up, boys, er, men of America: You need to take control to get...

